Explaining My Depression to Some One Who is Not Depressed
Updated: Mar 19, 2018
Telling somebody how you feel can be difficult, especially when you don't know exactly how you feel yourself. Well here is my best take on explaining my depression:
First things first, depression is not sadness. Depression is actually the lack of feelings. It is very hard to come up with synonyms of an unexplained emptiness that takes control over your brain, body, and overall life. For me, the best word I can use is numb. I feel nothing.
Although, symptoms of depression show in many ways, they most likely present in the same way as sadness. (crying, moping, etc.) But, it is also so much more that.
Waking up in the morning is probably the most difficult task on hand for me. The effort that it takes to get out of bed and do daily things is a nightmare for me. This is included in the part of depression nobody talks about. When it gets to the point that you have no motivation to do anything except lay in your bed and sleep. Your favorite activities become distant memories and your hygiene is no longer a daily thing. Nothing is fun anymore and you feel as if thee is no point of trying. It is when you lash out at your favorite people and you have no idea why. You shut out more and more people as they try to help you.
Many people get confused thinking that depression always has a trigger, but sometimes there is no reason at all. You have no idea why you feel so badly about yourself because you have done nothing wrong. Crying becomes your newest hobby and you're not even sad. School work can't be completed because of your lack of focus. Concentration is no where to be found. Eating habits become irregular -- too much or too little.
Depression can also present in physical ailments such as migraines, body pains and aches, numbness in your limbs or face, etc. And last but not least, depression can sometimes get to the point where you have thoughts of self-harm, suicide, homicide, or hurting others. (If this is true for you, talk to someone right away!)
Although depression can be hard and almost feel unbearable at times, I am here to tell you, you matter. There is always a solution, even if you can not see it now. You were put on this earth for a reason and no matter what you have done in the past, forgiveness for yourself is out there. You are not a bad person and you are not your mental illness. A diagnosis does not define who you are. You do not have to suffer alone, I am always here to listen. Do not suffer in silence. Speak up. You're doing it. You are getting through this one day at a time. If you need to talk to somebody you can call 1-800-273-8255 (Suicide Hotline). Please seek help if you need it. You are not alone.
So there. Let's be honest. There is nothing common about depression and it presents differently in everybody. Reach out to your close family and friends and see how they are doing. Be kind. Spread awareness. Stay strong.